We all seem to have more problems than we need. We can resolve many of them without any trouble, but once in a while a really difficult situation comes along that just won’t yield to our best efforts to get rid of them.

Our initial reaction is to resist them, put up a protective wall and confront it is an enemy with which we feel we must do battle. Now the struggle begins. This confrontational approach to problem solving is negative and can produce only negative results; we find ourselves producing more frustration, anxiety, stress and fear than solutions.

Is there an alternative? Indeed there is. Let’s take a close analytical view of problem solving and see what’s really going on here. To be successful we must first accept the fact that the “old” ways are less than effective so any new approach must be a departure from accepted traditional methods.

Look at the world around you and recognize that we live in a world of opposites. We have up & down, short & tall, assets & liabilities, abundance & lack, profits & losses, positive & negative, freedom & bondage, etc., etc., etc. I don’t believe you can think of anything that does not have an implied opposite. Webster defines “opposites” as, “elements that are so far apart and diverse as to be totally irreconcilable one to the other”.

If, then, one of these elements is negative, defined by Webster as, “something that is the opposite or negation of something”, its opposite must be positive, which Webster defines as, “that which is real, not speculative, not fictitious and logically affirmative”.

As we think about it, we realize that what this is saying is that anything negative (the problem) cannot exist alone but requires a positive something to be negative about. That positive “something” is the solution to our problem. We cannot have a problem unless its solution is already available. All we need do is learn how to access it.

To solve any problem, then, we must discipline ourselves to see it only as a negation or unawareness of the answer we are seeking and which already exists. How do we access this? By calmly rejecting that which presents itself to us as a problem, (“an intricate, unsettled question without an answer” [Webster]) as not a “something” we give reality to and quietly search our mind with a “listening” positive expectancy and be responsive to the answer that will present itself to you in this positive mental environment.

Consider the procedure you use when confronted with 2 plus 2 = 8. To resolve this error, you do not focus your efforts on trying to understand the “8” but you reject it and draw on the truth that only a “4” belongs at the end of 2 plus 2. The problem is “solved”.

I know how abstract, unrealistic and impractical this approach sounds, but for many years I have proven its viability in my own personal and professional experiences and to the benefit of a widely diverse client base that has included many of the giants of American business. This revolutionary approach to problem solving is predicated on natural laws and principles which Webster defines as, “the creative and controlling forces of the universe”. Such a condition is absolute and irrevocable. It is the law.

Where the mind is without fear….

We are often warned not to push anyone into a corner because that is when they fight their best and most vicious battles. A good hunter will never force a wild animal in a situation from where it perceives no escape; the animal must feel there is still some escape route. Because it is when the animal loses hope of escape, that it will fight at its wildest and cause the worse harm.

A cornered creature, man or animal, is dangerous, even vicious. For, that is the point at which one loses all fear. You become fearless when you lose that which you value the most. Because, when that happens, the rest doesn’t really seem to matter as much. And, you also realize the futility of having lived in fear of losing something that is now beyond reach.

You understand that you could possibly have been able to enjoy the finer intricacies of your object of desire much more if you hadn’t lived in constant fear of losing it. When you lose it, you see the futility of all the anxiety, the heartburn over it. You start looking for and finding ways of living without it. and the human mind and spirit, amazingly resilient as they are, discover reasons and conviction for why you are better off iwthout that which is now lost.

And that is the point at which you start enjoying the positive aspects of fearlessness. For, when you fear nothing, nobody can manipulate you anymore. You would be your own person and not dependent on anyone for your happiness or peace of mind. Your best bouts of courage are reserved for times when you have nothing to lose.

Most manipulations in relationships occur because we hand over the weapon of our fear to be used against us to those we love most. A lover is able to manipulate his beloved’s emotions by threatening withdrawal of love and care. He will sulk, not talk or withdraw caring gestures – all the things that a loved one values. So you givein, bow to the will of the lover, and make compromises, all for fear of losing that which is cherished.

On the other hand, if the lover overplays his hand and carries on the withdrawal act beyond a point, the beloved may finally get used to the idea of rejection and taking the loss as a fate accomplish, lose all fear in the relationship.

Fear of losing leaves you impotent not just in relationships but also in everyday situations such as your work life, with friends or relatives and even with strangers. It extends beyond material things to prestige, respect, happiness, peace of mind, etc.

At work, how often we let people get away with delivering shoddy work, doing an injustice to someone or cheating us just because we fear losing our peace of mind over an altercation! we allow incompetent people to underperform for fear of creating a situation and so losing our calm.

For courage is not just required for doing battle, but also for maintaining a sense of calm, for making money for living a good life – in short for everything. the ‘fight or flight’ syndrome kicks in irrespective of the fact whether the thing we fear losing in physical, mental or a financial threat.

Those who can learn the trick of transcending this fear of loss, would find the courage to enjoy that which they love most while they still retain it. What is needed, rather than running away or controlling or suppressing or any other resistance, is understanding fear; that means, watch it, learn about it, come directly into contact with it. We are to learn about fear, not how to escape from it.

Think of worst that can possibly happen. Get used to the idea and accept it. From there on, things can only get better… and you can acquire courage even as you retain the object you feared losing, for you fear that no more. You know loss is a possibility and you are moving ahead with that in mind.

You can conquer almost any fear if you will only make up your mind to do so. For remember, fear doesn’t exists anywhere except in the mind.

The enemy is fear. We think it is hate; but, it is fear. – MAHATMA GANDHI