But the biggest challenge of them all is one’s mind. Often, it is possible to control everything else but one’s mind. Being master of the mind is no less than mastery of the world. Chapter 6 of Bhagavad Gita says, “Our mind is our best friend and our worst enemy. If we know how to manage our mind, we can manage our time, our relationships, our life, everything.”

This is where spirituality comes in. Spirituality is not a way to look at certain things, it is a certain way to look at all things. It is the path to a mentally decluttered value-based life. It is also about managing relationships in different sorts of challenging situations. Spirituality teaches us control of our thoughts, emotions and desires. It is actually the science of managing one’s mind.

The result: A sense of well being, tranquility and inner peace. It also creates the feeling that one is on top of the situation and in control of it, rather than the other way round. Spirituality is not bound by the confines of religion because it’s not about chanting prayers, undertaking pilgrimages or charitable work. It’s about much more than that. Contrary to what we all believe, spirituality is not just for mystics or old people. It is meant for everyone.

Life is beautiful but only if you really want it to be that way. This needs you to make a conscious decision to achieve your full potential and give your life greater meaning. Many of us are not aware of our potential. One must never let life slide by. Inspiration, curiosity, love, knowledge and enthusiasm give life its true meaning. We are said to be ‘living’ life only when we experience happiness, lvoe and fearlessness, not stress, anxiety, boredom and a sense of aimlessness.

The truth is we need sincerely to try to enjoy every step of this journey called life. One is always waiting for something to happen to be happy. Alternatively, we wait to complete the job at hand and then enjoy the fruits of it. But that means we are always postponing happiness. Happiness is in the journey not the destination.

It is important to do things we value because only then can we give 100% of ourselves ot it. Chapter 3 of Bhagavad Gita explains that this si about the concept of swadharma, or finding one’s true calling and following it sincerely. Once we value what we do, we start feeling good about ourselves. The self-esteem goes up. It also gives a sense of purpose and meaning to our lives.

Once we start to have some controls over our actions and become more positive in our outlook, we may also find the law of attraction coming into play. Inexplicable events occur and we find things falling into place for us. they seem to be coincidence but that’s the law of attraction working for you. You attract what you think. We can align our inner world with the strong belief that whatever we wish for will happen. When you think positive, you get positive results. Let the power of positive affirmation take over. It was well said that what you visualize it that you realize.

The capacity to sacrifice is something we must all reckon with. It is sacrifice that enables one to appreciate the real worth of what one does because it takes a great deal of effort, introspection and prioritization to give away something. Sacrifice always brings joy and growth. An important aspect of sacrifice is that it requires you to go beyond your comfort zone, which creates a physical, emotional and intellectual blanket around us and prevents us thinking new thoughts.

We become prisoners of our self created comfort zones. We don’t open up to new people and become averse to criticism. We cling to the emotional crutches we have created.

At the intellectual level also we become stubborn. “It’s either my way or no way” is the constantly nagging feeling.

On the other hand, when we sacrifice something, seek something else and transcend our comfort zone, we are no longer scared of change and grow as individuals.

In real terms, most of us are averse to change and resist it. We fail to realize that everything is changing anyway, whatever comes has to go and it is pointless to cling to it. That’s when one can start to come to terms with life’s ultimate truth, i.e. that change is the only constant.

The Bhagvad Gita says, “When we live in this world, we experience the pairs of opposites – hot and cold, joy and sorrow, success and failure. They come and they go. And even while they are here, they are temporary.

Most of times, it is resistance to a changing situation, rather than the situation itself that creates conflict. Instead, one should face a situation as it is and refrain from coloring it with biases. Lapsing into “why me” or “why did it have to happen” makes for mental turmoil.

Through acceptance of situation as it is, one automatically starts focusing on finding a solution rather than on the problem itself, And sure enough, one does come up with a sensible solution.

As Harivansh Rai Bachan said, “Apne man ka ho to achha. Na ho to aur bhi achaa. (If we get what we want, it’s good. If we don’t get it, it’s even better).”

You can find people in leadership roles almost everywhere you look. However, simply shouldering responsibilities of a leader doesn’t necessarily makea a person an effective leader. Leadership itself is a privilege and a skill. There are many leadership skils and competencies that when combined and applied, go towards making you an effective leader.

So what is empathy? Empathy is the ability to have an intuitive understanding of other people and their needs. Within a business setting, it is critical for empathy to be as widespread as possible, permeating all departments from sales to accounting to manufacturing. In today’s world, as evidenced by the terrible financial crisis of last year, there is a possibility that we could get too caught up in data. When we do that, we often fail to see truths that are right in front of us. Employees at ll levels of an organization need to understand the people beyond the office walls – their customers, their clients etc. This enables everyone to make better real-world decisions. Over time, even the smallest decisions influenced by empathy add together to produce a more informed and nimble organization.

Empathy is a necessary attribute of a great leader but i is not sufficient. A lot more is required. In fact, some highly aggressive corporate environments see empathy as a sign of weakness. A good example of such cold-bloodedness was the hot-shot chief executive Albert John Dunlap, who appeared to relish the title of ‘Chainsaw A1′, bestowed upon him for the way he could and would fire any number of employees without hesitation. Well, he was considered to be golder CEO for a while, but he ended up being denounced for an accounting fraud! And that’s the core of the matter – people who are not empathetic often end up being selfish and short sighted instead.

Effective leaders, make tough decisions when situations warrant, but hey also communicate with employees and understand what they are going through. Empathy distinguishes a good leader from the great ones, in a crises situations.

It has been understood that empathy is one quality that a leader must possess in order to be successful and it also plays a role in making an organization achieve its vision. So,, what are the behaviors that go into making any person empathetic towards others and how can this quality be developed?

Empathy can be built from three major behavior
- Recognizing your own shortcomings – past and present.
- Listening to others and learning more about their lives and their private challenges
- Explicitly aspiring to a noble deal of leadership.

If you want your business to adopt widespread empathy, there are really three steps to follow.
1 – Leave the office and get outside. Go to places where people are most likely to act like themselves.
2 – Be genuinely interested in other people. Forget about what is that you do and start caring about the needs of others. Find the real needs first and your solutions will dramatically improve too.
3 – Bring evidence of the real world back to your offices.

Empathetic leaders position people first. True empathy stems from the leader’s ability to display genuine concern towards the needs of others. High level of empathy is denoted by:
1 – Listening to people:
Pay attention to their tone of voice, to the hidden emotions behind what they are saying to you and to the context. Don’t interrupt people. Don’t dismiss their concerns offhand.

2 – Focusing on the non-verbal communication:
the body language of people often communicates what they think or feel, even when their verbal communication says something quite different.

3 – Being fully present:
when you are conversing with people, don’t check your email, look at your watch or take phone calls. Allow people to have their comment.

4 – A Smile:
it makes people comfortable and you more.

Hence, it can rightly be said that, even if you have all the qualities of becoming a successful leader, but if you miss the basic quality of feeling empathy towards your teammates, your journey towards success will be very short lived. Put yourself in their shoes and see how success touches your feet.

Is that good enough? Or, does one need to apply more stringent, rigid standards? In a book called “The Difficulty of Being Good” – By Gurcharan Das. He has examined the Mahabharata through an analysis of the one predominant characteristics – good or bad – of each of the epic’s characters. What is heartening is that all good characters in the epic seem confused too, at some point or other.

Yudhishthira is convinced he cannot declare war against his elders and brothers, but still does so; Arjuna is dead against killing his grandfather, his teacher and an unarmed Karna, and yet does it; Bhishma is goodness personified, but he doesn’t try to stop his grandchildren from attempting to disrobe the hapless Draupadi in court. He also leads the armies of one set of grandchildren against another!

Who can deny Lord Krishna’s goodness? and yet, at times we question the advice he gave Arjuna that let to the killing of his grandfather Bhishma, his teacher Drona and his brother Karna! Goodness, it seems, is confusing.

The goody-goody characters on television confound the confusion. They are so good, so pure, so butter wouldn’t melt in their mouth that they are not just unbelievable, but actually irritating! They suffer vicissitudes and insults with never a word against those who persecute them. Their ‘nobility’ makes you squirm in your seat.

Now, why should goodness irritate? But truth is that too big a shot of goodness does arouse discomfort! All of us know at least one friend, aunt, cousin, or even our parent or sibling who irriate with their saccharine goodness or obsession of self-sacrifice! They are so good that they seem Divine! Such people are an anachronism in today’s world! They set such high standards that they make us feel inadequate.

Mahabharata too has its moments of irritating goodness. Yudhisthira is calm and unmoved during the period of exile as Draupadi’s temper blazes. “Why be good?” she asks and “Why doesn’t your anger blaze?” His goodness at that point is irritating to his beloved wife and brothers, as enumerated by Gurcharan Das.

The Mahabharata reminds us once again about the difficulty of being good.

Is it important to have some bit of vice because the bad instinct is inborn, a part of us? And goodness is the struggle against that instinct; we all achieve varying degrees of success and so are good in different ways. That’s human. And so Krishna is good, so are Yudhishthira and Arjuna. Their struggle against evil, their moments of weakness and their repentance make them so.

So then, are we saying that actually, it is the evil within us that makes us good? Just as without darkness, who would appreciate light? How can you be good if you have no shade of bad within you?

These are the exact same changes that an individual must make in order to create personal change, that a company must make in order to create a lasting competitive advantage, and that a community must make in order to best serve its citizens.

Step One—Raise Your Standards

Any time you sincerely want to make a change, the first thing you must do is to raise your standards.

Simply put, you MUST expect and demand more from yourself and from those around you. That means having zero tolerance for mediocrity, procrastination, and any behavior that robs you of potential and increased performance.

Step Two—Change Your Limiting Beliefs

If you raise your standards but don’t really believe you can meet them, then you’ve already sabotaged yourself. This is one of the biggest challenges people face when constructing their personal plan.

Why? Because you won’t even try; you’ll be lacking that sense of certainty that allows you to tap the deepest capacity that’s within you even as you read these words.

Our beliefs are like unquestioned commands; telling us how things are, what’s possible and what’s impossible, what we can and cannot do. They shape every action, every thought, and every feeling that we experience.

As a result, changing our belief system is central to making any real and lasting change in our lives.

Step Three—Change Your Strategy

In order to keep your commitment, you need the best strategies for achieving results. One of my core beliefs is that if you set a higher standard, and you can get yourself to believe, then you certainly can figure out the strategies. You simply will find a way.

The Seven S approach is a framework that focuses on guiding managers to improving, not just our processes, but our entire strategic approach to the business.The Seven S approach is a framework that focuses on guiding managers to improving, not just our processes, but our entire strategic approach to the business.

So what are the Seven S’s, and how do they fit together to help consultants and managers improve business performance? Here’s a brief walk through of the attributes of the Seven Ss.

#1. Strategy: The overriding goal or objective that the enterprise wishes to achieve, and the course of action it intends to take to reach that goal. From the viewpoint of IT, the key question here is often about alignment. Are the activities of the IT staff focused on achieving the strategic goals of the organization? Is there a forward-looking IT plan or road-map that illustrates how the IT function will drive towards to long-term strategic objectives of the firm? Is the CIO involved in strategy formulation or just an implementer? Every IT professional has experienced situations in which a manager or executive becomes enamored of some technical solution, often sold to her by a sales representative as the “end-all fix,” and IT finds itself devoting all its energies to implementing a product that is disconnected from the firm’s strategic goals.

#2. Structure: The manner in which the enterprise is organized, and the relationships between the entities, such as departments, field offices, etc. Is the organization authoritarian, like the military, or decentralized or federated? How do internal processes and human resources work together to achieve the goals? In my consulting experience, I’ve seen many firms that want to migrate to an e-commerce approach to sales, and yet see e-commerce enablement as a project, rather than as a structural problem that needs to be solved. No matter how great the e-commerce engine an organization builds, if it’s internal organization and structure is not modified to adapt to this new channel, it has very little chance of success.

#3. Systems: Not just information systems and infrastructure, but also the processes and the functions that enable the organization to work, such as recruiting, accounting, and procurement. From e-commerce to data warehousing and knowledge management, and all across the array of processes and systems that companies employ to deliver their products and services, the ability to make the right technology decisions, to optimize processes, and to enhance productivity are make-or-break elements of success.

#4. Staff: The human resources that actually accomplish the work, and the recruiting, incentives, and compensation practices that encourage them to achieve. An organization’s ability to attract and retain the best talents and to keep them motivated and productive is key to execution of the enterprises goals. All the strategic innovation in the world cannot compensate for an unmotivated staff or low productivity.

#5. Style: The elusive “corporate culture” is captured here; is the enterprise customer focused and quality driven or focused on maximizing profitability at any cost? Does the enterprise strive to build a cohesive team of its staff, or does the organization view its workforce as a series of interchangeable hands-for-hire?

#6. Skills: The unique competencies that drive competitive advantage. From the “hard” technical skills of designing products and managing projects to the “soft” skills of communication and teamwork, staff capabilities are essential elements of strategic success. This element also addresses organizational skills: As we’ve recently learned in the case of General Motors, the ability of an organization to develop products or services that the marketplace values is the differentiating factor in the market battlefield.

#7. Shared Values: The core beliefs and attitudes that drive the enterprise. Values are not the mission of the company — that should be captured in the firm’s strategy. Values are about behaviors, taking the form of statements like “we’ll never sacrifice customer satisfaction for short term profit” or “we always thank the customer for choosing us.”

Seven S is just a conceptual framework; therefore, it doesn’t tell us how to fix those areas that require development. By applying your experience, reviewing the ideas found in the literature (such as Good to Great and other business classics), enlisting the insights and suggestions of members of the organization, and applying disciplines like Six Sigma where appropriate, you can help firms apply a consistent approach to strategy development and execution and improve their results and competitive position.

An effective project leader is often described as having a vision of where to go and the ability to articulate it. Visionaries thrive on change and being able to draw new boundaries. It was once said that a leader is someone who “lifts us up, gives us a reason for being and gives the vision and spirit to change.” Visionary leaders enable people to feel they have a real stake in the project. They empower people to experience the vision on their own. According to Bennis “They offer people opportunities to create their own vision, to explore what the vision will mean to their jobs and lives, and to envision their future as part of the vision for the organisation.” (Bennis, 1997)

Good Communicator

The ability to communicate with people at all levels is almost always named as the second most important skill by project managers and team members. Project leadership calls for clear communication about goals, responsibility, performance, expectations and feedback.

There is a great deal of value placed on openness and directness. The project leader is also the team’s link to the larger organisation. The leader must have the ability to effectively negotiate and use persuasion when necessary to ensure the success of the team and project. Through effective communication, project leaders support individual and team achievements by creating explicit guidelines for accomplishing results and for the career advancement of team members.

Integrity

One of the most important things a project leader must remember is that his or her actions, and not words, set the modus operandi for the team. Good leadership demands commitment to, and demonstration of, ethical practices. Creating standards for ethical behaviour for oneself and living by these standards, as well as rewarding those who exemplify these practices, are responsibilities of project leaders. Leadership motivated by self-interest does not serve the well being of the team. Leadership based on integrity represents nothing less than a set of values others share, behaviour consistent with values and dedication to honesty with self and team members. In other words the leader “walks the talk” and in the process earns trust.

Enthusiasm

Plain and simple, we don’t like leaders who are negative – they bring us down. We want leaders with enthusiasm, with a bounce in their step, with a can-do attitude. We want to believe that we are part of an invigorating journey – we want to feel alive. We tend to follow people with a can-do attitude, not those who give us 200 reasons why something can’t be done. Enthusiastic leaders are committed to their goals and express this commitment through optimism. Leadership emerges as someone expresses such confident commitment to a project that others want to share his or her optimistic expectations. Enthusiasm is contagious and effective leaders know it.

Empathy

What is the difference between empathy and sympathy? Although the words are similar, they are, in fact, mutually exclusive. According to Norman Paul, in sympathy the subject is principally absorbed in his or her own feelings as they are projected into the object and has little concern for the reality and validity of the object’s special experience. Empathy, on the other hand, presupposes the existence of the object as a separate individual, entitled to his or her own feelings, ideas and emotional history (Paul, 1970). As one student so eloquently put it, “It’s nice when a project leader acknowledges that we all have a life outside of work.”

Competence

Simply put, to enlist in another’s cause, we must believe that that person knows what he or she is doing. Leadership competence does not however necessarily refer to the project leader’s technical abilities in the core technology of the business. As project management continues to be recognised as a field in and of itself, project leaders will be chosen based on their ability to successfully lead others rather than on technical expertise, as in the past. Having a winning track record is the surest way to be considered competent. Expertise in leadership skills is another dimension in competence. The ability to challenge, inspire, enable, model and encourage must be demonstrated if leaders are to be seen as capable and competent.

Ability to Delegate Tasks

Trust is an essential element in the relationship of a project leader and his or her team. You demonstrate your trust in others through your actions – how much you check and control their work, how much you delegate and how much you allow people to participate. Individuals who are unable to trust other people often fail as leaders and forever remain little more that micro-managers, or end up doing all of the work themselves. As one project management student put it, “A good leader is a little lazy.” An interesting perspective!

Cool Under Pressure

In a perfect world, projects would be delivered on time, under budget and with no major problems or obstacles to overcome. But we don’t live in a perfect world – projects have problems. A leader with a hardy attitude will take these problems in stride. When leaders encounter a stressful event, they consider it interesting, they feel they can influence the outcome and they see it as an opportunity. “Out of the uncertainty and chaos of change, leaders rise up and articulate a new image of the future that pulls the project together.” (Bennis 1997) And remember – never let them see you sweat.

Team-Building Skills

A team builder can best be defined as a strong person who provides the substance that holds the team together in common purpose toward the right objective. In order for a team to progress from a group of strangers to a single cohesive unit, the leader must understand the process and dynamics required for this transformation. He or she must also know the appropriate leadership style to use during each stage of team development. The leader must also have an understanding of the different team players styles and how to capitalise on each at the proper time, for the problem at hand.

Problem Solving Skills

Although an effective leader is said to share problem-solving responsibilities with the team, we expect our project leaders to have excellent problem-solving skills themselves. They have a “fresh, creative response to here-and-now opportunities,” and not much concern with how others have performed them. (Kouzes 1987)

Military leaders know that setting a good example is the best way to mold the behavior you want to see in subordinates.
There’s no better way to garner the respect of those who look to you for cues about work ethic than to have a great one yourself. Nothing kills the spirit of a team faster than a leader who sees himself separate from and above the standards he sets for them.

Teamwork

With the military, there is obviously a lot more at stake than corporate profit. The ability of a group of people to work together and to trust each other can mean the difference between life and death. But there are lots of other tangible benefits of great teamwork, including greater efficiency, clearer role sets, and an infusion of different ideas into a process.

Communication

This is where it seems to me that the corporate world is most deficient, and many of the communication issues stem from the top down. Leaders should share the vision with everyone who has a role in making it happen.

No sugar coating

In the military, if someone is exhibiting a pattern of behavior that could be detrimental to him or to his peers, that person is told about it. Military leaders are working to build better people. If honest appraisals make that happen, then more power to them. None of the corporate HR double-talk that has arisen due to a fear of lawsuits or hurt feelings. If someone misses deadlines on your staff, then just say it. Don’t try to “soften the blow” by saying, “Deadlines were missed.” This does not mean that, you get in an employee’s face and scream like a drill sargeant, but give that person an opportunity to correct the unacceptable behavior.

Being explicit with expectations

It may be drilled into their heads, but military personnel understand what is expected of them. And again, this is easier to do in that case because the repercussions are more black and white. You don’t do your job in a situation of conflict and someone could die. But good managers can and should make expectations clear (and not just “make us more money”) in the corporate world.

Recognition

Maybe this is a naive way of thinking, but wouldn’t it be nice if corporate employees could wear ribbons or medals indicating their accomplishments in the field? Actual recognition for an achievement that might otherwise be forgotten about months down the road? Maybe it would be harder for executives to lay off older workers if those employees had rows of medals on their lapels.

Here is a list of things that help you in self management and which will in turn lead you to the path of success:

-) Look at every new opportunity as an exciting and new-life experience.

-) Be a professional who exhibits self-confidence and self-assurance in your potential to complete any task.

-) Agree with yourself in advance that you will have a good attitude toward the upcoming task.

-) Frequently ask, “Is what I am doing right now moving me toward my goals?”

-) Do it right the first time and you will not have to take time later to fix it.

-) Accept responsibility for your job successes and failures. Do not look for a scapegoat.

-) Do not view things you do as a “job.” View all activities as a challenge.

-) Use your subconscious mind by telling it to do what you do want. Instead of telling yourself, “I can’t do that very well,” say, “I can do this very well.”-) Give yourself points for completing tasks on your “to-do” list in priority order. When you reach 10 points, reward yourself.

-) Practice your personal beliefs. It may be helpful each morning to take 15 minutes to gather your thoughts and say a prayer.

-) Make a commitment to show someone a specific accomplishment on a certain date. The added urgency will help you feel motivated to have it done.

-) Practice self-determination, wanting to do it for yourself.

-) Believe that you can be what you want to be.

-) Never criticize yourself as having a weakness. There is no such thing. You are only talking about a present undeveloped skill or part of yourself that if you so chose, you can change. You do not have any weakness, only untapped potential.

-) Be pleasant all the time-no matter what the situation.

-) Challenge yourself to do things differently than you have in the past. It provides new ideas and keeps you interested.

-) Talk to yourself. A self-talk using positive affirmation is something that is common among all great achievers. They convince themselves that they can accomplish their goals.

-) Create your own “motivation board” by putting up notes of things you need to do on a bulletin board or special wall space. It is an easily visible way to see what you need to work on. When an item is done, remove the note. Also keep your goals listed and pictured on your board.

-) Stay interested in what you are doing. Keep looking for what is interesting in your work. Change your perspective and look at it as someone outside your job would,

-) Establish personal incentives and rewards to help maintain your own high enthusiasm and performance level.

If you think you’re unable to work for the best company in its sphere, make it your aim.

If you think you’re incapable of running a company, make that your aim.

If you think you’re unable to be on the cover of Time magazine, make it your business to be there.

Make your vision of where you want to be a reality.

Nothing is impossible.